the tree

We didn't get to go to the mountains for a tree last year. Josh had basketball on Saturdays and the one Sunday we could have gone, he had a class out of town. I was so sad. We had to buy a tree instead. It just wan't the same and I was so hoping we would get to get back to the mountain this year.

And we made it! We got our annual B-with-daddy and B-with-mommy pictures (since there has only been one year when there was someone else with us, to take a family picture!) and had a fantastic time. The last time we went, B was three, and he cried the whole time. This year, he took the idea and ran with it. He insisted HE pick out the tree. (Though, that didn't quite happen.) He insisted HE be the line leader through the snow that was hip high on him in spots. He insisted on playing hard in it, despite the fact his mittens were wet and cold. He had a total blast.

And when we got it all decorated (again, he insisted HE put on all the ornaments, or at least point to a branch that may have been to high for him), I asked if he loved it. He said, "Not exactly." One more ornament and it was much better, ready to be loved for the month.

so behind

I'm so far behind in blogging. I'm so sorry. I have a lot to talk about but it seems like there's no time to write it down!

So I can come back to it later and remember, and so you know that yes, I have been busy, here's what I still need to tell you:

* Went to District Clinic with my kids for two days before Thanksgiving
* Came home to sleep in my bed for one night
* Went to Josh's parents' house for Thanksgiving.
* Everyone was home and we managed to find time to have Christmas then, too
* Went on a Black Friday middle of the night adventure with my MIL and one of my SIL's.
* Stayed a day late and came home yesterday so Josh could have a dr. appointment and I got to eat out for my birthday... a rare treat with basketball season in session now!
* Christmas programs are coming up!
* Josh's first games of the season are this weekend!

i'm sick and tired....

....of being sick and tired.

I've had a cold for two weeks now. They don't usually last this long, but I was thanking my lucky stars that it didn't happen sooner in the school year... It usually hits me much sooner than this!

And then I was cursing my stars that it happened when it did. I was in desperate need of finishing the teaching of my Christmas program songs so we can spend the next few weeks trying out for solos and polishing stuff up! And of course, I COMPLETELY lost my voice. Couldn't sing a single note for a good week.

And then my face hurt. Pretty bad. I was hoping it was just the cold working its way through my sinuses, but then one day, I started walking and that alone made my teeth feel like a hammer hitting them.

So a visit to the school nurse ensued. I told her my suspicions and she agreed: CALL THE DOCTOR.

I got in on Thursday afternoon this week and I was sooo excited to go. How sad is that? But I was feeling so awful. Diagnosis: My very first sinus infection ever. Lucky me.

I was hoping the antibiotics would work miracles and I'd feel better the next day, but no such luck. I did feel better yesterday, but all that meant was it didn't feel like my face was going to shatter into a million pieces.

I'm hoping I can get a great night's sleep tonight. Brecken was up bright and early this morning so that meant we all were too. And I felt terrible all morning. I did get a couple hour nap this afternoon though and I feel much better this evening. So hopefully I can get good sleep tonight, as I'm leaving tomorrow afternoon with some students for a trip to Cheyenne for a couple days for an honor choir and band clinic. I keep thinking back to 7 years ago, this SAME exact trip, and I came down with an allergic reaction to some antibiotic I was on, for something I can't even remember. But we got to Cheyenne on the bus and I broke out in head to toe hives so bad that someone asked how I had gotten so sunburned. I was hallucinating by the time we got home the next day. My teacher friend found a car and took me to Urgent Care where they diagnosed me with an allergy to sulfa drugs.

I'd rather not repeat that experience this year. :)

trucking along

We're trucking along here, at about a hundred miles an hour! Josh's football season is now over and it came just in time... I worked 12 hour days every day last week so it was nice to have Josh home because I'm not sure what we would have done with Brecken!

Monday was Halloween. I raced home from school and we took Brecken trick-or-treating downtown. Then we went home to scarf down some grilled cheese sandwhiches before heading to my school's Halloween Carnival. Brecken had a great time playing all the games! He did a great job. He didn't want to wear his costume, but he managed to do 40 minutes of the carnival without his headphones! He started to get hyper at the end of his time there, which for him, shows sensory stuff (that's how his body handles sensory overload), but he did a great job otherwise! He came home with lots of prizes, including a goldfish. He named him Goldie, but unfortunately, Goldie only lived until Thursday. I'm very glad I explained beforehand to Brecken that goldfish don't live a very long time, because it wasn't nearly as sad this time as when his beta died.

Josh and Brecken left the carnival early to come home and trick-or-treat. Brecken had written out a list of houses he wanted to go to, so of course, we had to fulfill the list!

Tuesday I had to take my kids to audition for all-state and didn't get home until 7:00, in the middle of a blizzard.

Wednesday and Thursday nights were parent-teacher conferences.

Friday, thankfully, was an early out for me! Hip, hip, hooray! We loaded up the car and went to see our new niece. She had turned a month old and we had yet to meet her. So we went to see them for the weekend. She's a beauty, that's for sure! Brecken had a great time playing with his cousin Bryell and holding baby Brenna. He's very proud of himself that he got Brenna to go to sleep. :)

Today I'm home with a sick little boy. We've been up with his sick since 6:00 and it's hard to believe it's only 8:00 now... seems we've been awake for many more hours!

love and marriage

"Mom, Sophie wants to marry me. So does Madison, though. And I have no idea which one to choose!" *big huge sigh*

tornado in my house

That's right, my house looks like a tornado went through it.

It's been worth it though... we've had some very fun and busy weekends lately!

A couple weekends ago we went to Lingle to bring my B-man to the pumpkin patch. We went through the corn maze, lauched tomatoes, played on the toy tractors, and came home with 95 pounds worth of pumpkin. Josh's mom and dad came with us and we had a great, great day! The weather was perfect and we had a fantastic time.

This past weekend, we went up North. Josh's last game of the regular season was a 6 hour drive (one way!) from here, but I didn't have school so B and I packed up and drove up there. On the way, we stopped and picked up my grandma and brought her with us. It was a big game... if we won, we'd make it to the playoffs for the first time in 4 years! And... WE WON! Brecken was so excited and was sure it sure it was because he wore his purple and gold sweatshirt and gold hat. :) We now have a playoff game this Friday. I will take a half day off and go too.

After the game, Josh got off the bus and we stayed the weekend with my grandma. It had been a long time since we've been there; it was long overdue! We had a great weekend there. We got our Christmas gift-giving list started at the Holiday Show there, we went to the museum to see the dinosaurs, walked to the park, and relaxed. It was fantastic!

With as busy as we've been, my house is a disaster..... I'm kind of looking forward to a weekend off to clean. How sick is that?!

noodles and butter

We had noodles and butter for dinner last night. Brecken got to choose. Here's why:

We had his annual IEP meeting after school yesterday. His teachers are so proud of him! He has gained a ton of confidence, he's not afraid to answer a question, give ideas, or play with kids. He's not not-finishing his work now, he's now getting it all done and does it quickly (but correctly), too. He's at his age level or ahead for academic skills. They said the only times he really prefers to play with the adults is at recess when he's wanting to play sports, and they are sure it's because the other kids don't have near the sport skills he does, so he doesn't want to play with them... they don't give him a challenge the teachers do. :) He is now one of the class leaders instead of a non-participant. SO glad to hear this.

He would test out of the speech part of his IEP because his goals have been met, but he can't receive OT services as a stand-alone Dx, so she's keeping him on speech with a little teeny goal. OT is going to keep working with him on fine motor skills like snapping and buttoning and holding his pencil right and hand strength, because it's kinda puny. His sensory goals have pretty much been met in the academic setting... they said he is doing EXCELLENT at being able to use the strategies the OT taught him to be able to better handle all the sensory stimuli. Home and other settings are another story but he's getting SO much better at learning how to handle them. (and really, I'd rather have him be able to hold it together at school than at home!) The things we are doing at home are just what we need to be doing and we'll continue to see improvement!

The OT told us something that we already knew but other people have trouble understanding. She said his SPD is something he will always have, it's not something you grow out of, you just learn how to handle it. Which he does... 9 times out of 10 now, he'll ask for his headphones instead of having a meltdown. So that's good! He will not "grow out of" this... he will always have it. It may come to where it isn't an issue anymore, because he has learned to deal with it completely, but he will still have it.

They are aware of his clothing issues and will work more on that... and they know about his bedtime stuff (and not sleeping in his room) and they said what we are doing is spot on and he'll get there eventually. It has to be done on his own time otherwise it won't happen because pushing him will make him regress. So that was nice to hear that we are doing things right. :) His OT did say that she uses him (without his name) in examples of what brushing can do for kids with SPD. I'm glad it works. :) He is NOT being brushed at school anymore and he's been fine. Yay! (Though she suggested we keep doing it at night and before new things, like we have been.) They assured me that we are right in being able to tell the difference between being naughty and having a sensory meltdown. There IS a difference and we are getting to be pros at knowing the difference. :) I kind of feel bad for others who don't see him all the time, because I'm sure it looks like he's the biggest brat. He's not, I promise. You can ask our OT if you don't believe me.

He will be re-tested in the spring to see what we need to do for the transition to Kindergarten.

So we told him we were very proud of him and let him pick dinner. So we had noodles and butter and sprinkle cheese. :)

(and just for comparison on how he was last year at this meeting... click here. It's quite a change!)

a sneak peek

Here is a sneak peek of our family photo shoot we did last weekend. Man, am I glad we went last weekend instead of this weekend... last weekend it was a beautiful 82 degrees. One week later, it was snowing. Hard. We lucked out on this one. :)

http://www.juststaceyj.com/2011/10/09/they-need-another/

Thank you, Stacey. They are beautiful. If your blog counter says a computer from here got on your blog 1000 times, its because I did. I can't stop staring at these. :)

snow

We had our first snow the other night.  *sigh*  The only one excited about it in our house is the B-man.  It is snowing huge fat flakes again today so he got out his snow pants, his new winter coat, his gloves, his hat and his snow boots (with thankfully fit still!) and he went out to play in it.  I think he ate more of it than he did play with it, though.  He can't wait until there is a bunch of dry snow (this snow is super wet!) so he can scoop it up in a bowl and eat it, which he has loved ever since when Amy babysat him and she introduced him to that snack.  :)

... and my heart swells

Last year at B's IEP meeting, they told us one of the big Sensory Disorder "aha" moments was when the kids tried different tastes and Brecken wouldn't even let them put anything on his plate.

Today, he told us that they tried a bunch of food at school today to see if it was sour or sweet or salty, AND they had to taste it with their eyes closed.

He tried them ALL. (and with his eyes closed, mind you!)

I sent his teacher a message on facebook, just to make sure, (because you know, kids have been known to remember things differently from time to time... haha!) and she replied with, "He absolutely did and we were all so excited - it was GREAT!" And then said they had so much fun today and he's having such a great year and is now one of the leaders in the class.

I'm SO PROUD OF HIM!!!! (and I won't lie, I got some happy tears in my eyes.)

He did NOT like:
Hot Tamales

Pickles

Lemons

Bitter Chocolate

But he LOVED:
salt

salty chips

pepper (this one surprised me!)

Way to go, my B-man!!!

five

We have a five year old.

I'm not sure how that happened.

I blinked, and he was no longer a baby, but a big boy.

And as he told me today, "See Mom? You didn't even cry about it."

We had a great weekend. We had a party for him yesterday. No family was available for a party this year, which was really odd. So we invited friends from school for the first time! We had a few kids running around, and his new babysitter, and a couple of our friends, and fun was had. This year, instead of a football cake, B-man wanted a basketball cake. Woo-hoo! I got to buy a new cake pan! :) (he had a football cake for his 1st, 3rd, and 4th birthdays!) He got a giant box of crayons, a coloring book, and a toy Lightning McQueen camera from his friend Sophie, a Lightning McQueen bowling set from some new friends (the dad is a new teacher at my school), a Play-Doh Cars set from his babysitter, and $10 from our friend and fellow coach and his wife. We had a football pinata filled with toys like green army men, plastic dinosaurs, plastic airplanes, etc. They all thought that was fun.

Today was about perfect. We woke up and B discovered his gift from Josh and I in the living room... a new Lightning McQueen bike! His 12" bike was getting too small, so he's now the proud owner of a new 16" one. He also got to open his cards he got in the mail... $5 from my mom and dad and $5 from Grandma Lou... put that together with what he got yesterday and the $5 he got from Josh's parents, the kid raked in $25 for his birthday! And said he's not spending it... he's saving it. For Disney World in 2014!)

After going out for breakfast, he got on his new bike and we headed to the park to play for a while. After he picked pizza for his birthday lunch, he and I played a couple games of Disney World Candy Land (from Aunt Kristen and Uncle David, which he also opened this morning!) while Daddy went to his football meeting. After the meeting though, we all got to go golfing! B was in total heaven. We played more Candy Land this evening before bed.

And a big day today in another sense... he wore jeans and a new t-shirt for exactly one minute AND let me take a picture! They came off after that one minute, but one minute is one minute longer than I have seen him wear denim since he was a baby, so I'm thrilled with that! :)

(I should note, we did get to celebrate with BOTH sets of his grandparents last weekend... we went out to dinner to Pizza Hut with them, where he received the spy plane from the new Cars 2 movie from my mom and dad, and a Cars 2 stunt set, a Cars 2 book, and a couple water guns from Josh's mom and dad. He loves them all! And can you tell he's a Cars fanatic??)

My baby said I didn't cry about him turning five, but that doesn't mean I didn't want to. He's come a long way in those five years and I couldn't be more in love.

the shoes

Brecken got some new shoes this weekend. We looked at three stores in Scottsbluff for just the right ones. He really wanted yellow and black ones, like his old shoes were. We looked and looked, and we found the perfect ones! He loved them from the start and I was really excited when he tried them on and he loved how they felt on him. I made him walk all over the store, try running, etc., just to make sure they were going to work for his senses. *phew* - he wanted them!

The shoe on the left is the one he had on in the picture I took on his 4th birthday. The shoe on the right is the new one. The one on the left is a size 9. The shoe on the left is a size 12. 3 shoe sizes in one year. Holy moly. I about fell over! (He has been wearing Crocs all summer, of course, so we didn't have a "real" shoe size for him!)

(These shoes are lined up at the back.... you can't tell, but they are.)

the first day

Today was the first day of school for all of us. (Josh and I went back last week, but kids didn't start until today. Same with B's preschool.) The day FLEW by!! I'm exhausted and can't believe how fast the day went. It was a good day though!

B had a great day at his first day too. Kacey said she cried when she dropped him off... I'm flattered that she loves my kid enough to cry!! He came home with all sorts of stories. It's in the afternoons this year, 12:00-3:15. They did fingerprints and looked at them under the magnifying glass, drew rainbows, read a story about a dog that went to school, played at recess, had snack... He was the only kid at Kacey's today though, I feel bad. :( The kid he played with last week started kindergarten today. B said he played with the dog a lot and they got to go see Kacey's horses, which he liked a LOT.

Hard to believe my baby started his last year of preschool. Even harder to think that he COULD have started kindergarten today instead, but we kept him back a year. I can't send a 4 year old to kindergarten, even if he does meet the cut off. But just looking at him, thinking he COULD HAVE started today, makes my heart beat a little faster. I'm glad we have one more year. ;)

the new lady

We started Brecken at a new daycare this year. The change between last year and this year has been total night and day. He has beat us out the door to get to Kacey's house in the mornings... I'm not going to lie, I totally love that! I'm so glad he feels comfortable at this house and has a good day. In fact, one day last week he got mad at me for picking him up too early! That hasn't happened since our beloved Amy lived here!

Kacey is an EMT with Josh and I secretly (or no so secretly) LOVE that. Not that anything would happen to my B-man while he was there, but gosh, you never know!!!

There aren't many kids at Kacey's... one little guy that B plays with that won't be there now because of kindergarten. He has a little sister, so hopefully the little sister will continue to go.

the day i cried in the middle of walmart

Today was the big day... we had to go to Riverton to pick up the half a beef we ordered, so we went to Walmart, too. We went back to the little boy's section, felt all the jeans, picked a few pairs B deemed "soft enough", and found the dressing room. Josh took him in and I waited outside, but I couldn't stand it anymore, so I knocked on the door to go in, too. And there he was... my baby... in jeans. I haven't seen him in jeans since he was 2 years old. I was so proud of him for even trying them on, and I figured he'd say they didn't feel good and we'd leave without any. Which would have been FINE. My amazement was fulfilled with him even trying them on. But, he liked a pair. I asked if he would wear them to school, and he said no. He said he would only wear them for his 5-year-old pictures. GREAT! I'm ecstatic with that; it's such a huge start! He did say the waist kinda bugged him (which, coming from elastic waist sweats and basketball shorts, it's gotta feel funny!) but he felt better when I assured him that if he wanted to, he could wear his shorts underneath the jeans. He nodded, said he liked them, and we bought two pairs of the kind he liked best.

That's when I cried.

This is such a big deal! I can't even tell you how proud of him I am. Like I said, I was excited that he just wanted to try them on, but for him to buy a pair.... it's like I was in a dream.

Whether or not he will actually wear them, I'm not sure. We're not going to make a big deal out of it, as he hates that kind of attention and he will backpedal. If he ends up freaking out and not wearing them, I'm ok with that. Like I said. He tried. And my heart is so full from that.

jeans

Brecken asked tonight if he could try on some jeans. I had to ask him to repeat the question, just so I could see if I heard correctly. And then I about fell out of my chair.

Of course, we don't own any jeans bigger than a 2T. So he'll have to wait until we go to a store. (which just happens to be tomorrow, we lucked out there!) I hope he still feels like it tomorrow! Even if they still hurt him, I'm TOTALLY stoked that he asked!!!

the last week

This is our last week of summer. It's always a really sad time. Once I get thrown into work, I'm fine... it's just that jump that I totally hate. I wish Josh and I both could be on permanent summer... I love the freedom of jumping in the car and going somewhere when we want to, sleeping in, staying up late, just hanging out all the time. I love the time with my family. But, since I don't want to live in a cardboard box down by the river.... we must work.

We've been working hard this week on last minute summer projects. We are rebuilding our deck; taking out the wood and putting in composite. Brecken has willingly been helping, and it's pretty fun to watch. :)

hair

B is about 6 weeks away from turning 5 years old, and last Thursday, we had a new breakthrough. He finally, finally decided it was OK to have his hair washed.

He's never liked it. Ever. It's always the most miserable part of the bath. Yes, we've tried a hundred different ways: Laying back on his own, laying back on our hand, tipping his head back while sitting up, using only a wash cloth, the special bucket that sits on your forehead while pouring back on your head... you get the picture. It's always a huge scream fest and it's the very last thing we do because he immediately stands up, while crying so hard I'm always sure he's going to fall down, and the bath is over.

However, this past Thursday, for some reason, he decided he would try once again, laying back on my hand. He didn't get any water on his face or in his eyes, and washing his hair was a success. It was so much of a success that we had to call Daddy back to witness it for a second time. And since then, he has asked for his hair to be washed every single day (and I am most happy to oblige!).

SPD is a funny thing. Most people reading this are probably thinking, "Why is washing hair such a big deal? My kid hasn't cried about water in his eyes since he was 10 months old. Just dump the water and be done with it." With an SPD kid, that's not always possible. And imagine our frustration before we knew WHY we couldn't do that!

Now, let's hope this new thing lasts :)

hot, hot, hot

It's been super hot here for the past week or so. I know, it's been nothing like what the midwest and back East have had, but our house does not have air conditioning. So when it gets to 94 degrees outside, it gets to 94 degrees inside. So we've been laying low the past few days, not doing anything too exciting, trying not to sweat to death.

Brecken and Josh have gotten their golfing in, though... B would never let that pass by without happening!

It was a lot cooler today which was a nice change. We woke up to overcast skies and 67 degrees... it felt wonderful! I shot some senior pictures for B's favorite high school babysitter, then we played at the park. I even turned on the oven for dinner tonight since I knew it wouldn't raise the inside temp to 100. :)

July is almost over, which means August is coming up... back to school stuff will be starting. :(

and some more

Last ones, I think... Some stick horse racing in the Whispering Canyon Cafe (where B got all his ketchup!) and B's favorite act in the Festival of the Lion King show... he LOVED the acrobats!

more videos

Here are a couple more... one from Typhoon Lagoon, where he rode this ride about 75 times (and I'm not exaggerating...). The other is from England in Epcot, where they had just made this hopscotch and beings how my B-man LOVES hopscotch, he had to be the first to try it out!

disney videos

I think I might have been successful in uploading a couple videos... If they work, I'll upload more! One of them is from the race track ride at Disney World, where Brecken was driving. I'm glad it was on a rail and we couldn't get too far off, because as you will see, he's a bit distracted in his driving. :) The other is when he wanted some ketchup, and he got plenty!

disney!

I've been absent again! This time with good reason though. We just got back from a WONDERFUL vacation to Disney World. We had a fantastic time and wish it wasn't going to be 3 years before we got to go again!

The first two nights were a bit rough. We stayed at All Star Sports for two nights before my parents came, when we could move to the Beach Club Resort. All Star Sports just happened to be hosting a whole slew of baseball players for a baseball tournament at the Disney sports complex, and they were QUITE loud. The resort was very busy, very loud (in both noise and colors!) and my B-man could not settle down. His SPD kicked in full force, and combine that with the normal kid-excitement, it was not much fun. The first night was full of head banging, rocking back and forth, hitting himself, and me just about in tears and thinking it was mean of us to bring him there. Second night, he had spent 6 hours that day swimming, so he was exhausted, so it was a little bit better.

After we moved to the Beach Club, he settled into a routine and we had a great time! He used his headphones when things got crazy, we used his Guest Assistance Card as needed, we took breaks in the cool restaurants, and we had a TON of fun!

Some things I was surprised about:

*He LOVES characters! He had absolutely NO reservations about running right up to them and giving them huge hugs!



*He is a thrill ride lover! One of his favorite rides was Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, a roller coaster, and by the 3rd time he rode it, he was putting his hands up in the air! :)



Some things that didn't surprise me:
*He didn't eat very well - it was new food, and new atmosphere with lots going on. He didn't starve, but he surely didn't pig out, either. :)

*He doesn't like scary things. Haunted Mansion was not a favorite ride of his. :)

minnesota

B and I went to Minnesota for a super quick trip. I got to take pictures of my brother-in-law's family, which was fun! B and I also got to attend my nephew's 5th birthday party. B was so excited to get to go to that. :)

B was such an amazing traveler for me. He walked right next to me through the airport, and never batted an eye about the no car seat thing I was worried about. He giggled the whole flight to MN and slept the whole way back. :)

I was amazed at the growth I saw in B while we were there. He volunteered to go with Uncle David to a video game store, rather than with me to Kohl's. Didn't even bat an eye while getting out of the car. At the party, he sat at the kid's table with excitement, and didn't even need to make sure he knew where I was. And all evening long, played with the kids without needing me to be in sight. ALL of these things are new developments. And I loved it! He was a KID, not a terrified little being. Love it.

travelers

My B-man and I are headed out on a very quick vacation tomorrow. We're flying to Minnesota to see my sister and go to my nephew's birthday part. I am also going to be taking family photos for my brother-in-law's whole family - they're going to be together for the first time in three years, I think I heard. We'll only be there for two full days but it will be fun! I'm sad Josh can't come. He has class this weekend so he won't be able to make it. :(

I'm a little nervous about the plane ride. I am not going to be bringing B's car seat, which we always have before. He feels safer in it, but as I'm traveling by myself and will be bringing our new stroller home with me, I just can't manage a kid, a stroller, our carry-ons, a suitcase, AND the car seat. He doesn't need a car seat for the plane, we've just always brought it to help him adjust to the plane better. (we'll be borrowing one of my sister's while we are in MN.) Remember, change of routine is very hard for B, and he likes feeling safe, so this might be an interesting flight. It'll get us practiced up for when we go to Disney World (two weeks from today!!!! yay!) though, as we aren't bring the car seat on that trip, either.

Cross your fingers and if you're the praying type, some prayers for safe travels would always be nice. :)

Ciao!

there was a baby in my belly

Last night we were watching House Hunters and the couple had six children. Three boys, and then three Chinese girls. I said, "look, they adopted a lot of kids!" Brecken then said, "You're going to adopt two!" I told him probably not, one was enough. He said, "No, I was one, and then we're getting another baby!"

We asked him if he thought he was adopted too, and he looked at me like it was obvious, and said, "Yes, mom!" I always wondered if B thought that's the way all babies came about. I love that it's so natural to him. But we corrected him and said that he grew inside my belly. And that my belly can't grow any more babies, so that's why some wonderful woman is going to grow one in her belly but let us adopt it for our own.

I then was telling him where his head liked to hang out while he was growing inside my belly. I showed him where it was (under my right ribs!) and how it would stick out and I'd have to push it back in, and how he liked to head-butt my ribs and how much that hurt, and he giggled and giggled and giggled.

And then while I was laying in bed last night, recalling the conversation, I remembered something I haven't thought about for a long time. As a mother growing a baby, you become incredibly intimate with their movements. Brecken used to do a stretch all the time and I can still feel what that felt like. And when I saw him do it for the first time OUTSIDE my belly, I got goosebumps because it was the EXACT same stretch he did inside. And now, I was able to see what it actually looked like. He would do it in his sleep, and his eyebrows would raise so high that I thought for sure his eyes had to open because his eyelids wouldn't stretch any more. They never did open though! And with his eyebrows raised, he'd pick up his chin and stretch his head up and back as much as he could, then he'd settle back down. It was amazing to see that happen, because I knew that stretch by feel so well. He would do it multiple times a day in my belly (which is odd since he never seemed to sleep! haha!) and he would do it multiple times a day when he was born. He still does it every once in a while, even at four years old.

It makes me incredibly sad to know that I probably won't know my next baby's movements so intimately. I will probably be missing out on that nine months of bonding time. B will probably be missing out on getting to feel a baby move in my belly. These parts still brings me to tears sometimes.

But. That new baby is going to bring us so much joy, even if I do miss out on those 40 incredible weeks. I hope it happens soon, because I have one excited little boy ready to be a big brother. :)

golf on the brain

Our child has golf on the brain. Big time. Every day he asks if we can go golfing! He got to play in his first golf tournament last week; we had our annual school district golf scramble and he got to play with us. He even sunk a putt for us to save par on one of the holes! His grin was a mile wide when we all started cheering loudly. :)

seven years

Josh and I celebrated our 7th anniversary yesterday. What a wonderful 7 years it has been! We've been on many adventures, many of which I'd never have been able to dream up on my wedding day 7 years ago, and I am so glad it was Josh that was by my side during them all.

B is getting to the age now where he understands more of what "anniversary" means. He told me on Saturday, "I think I know when you and Daddy got married." I said, "Oh yeah?" to which he replied, "Yep. It was when you left me at Grandma and Grandpa's." haha!

B got to spend yesterday evening with his favorite high school girl, eating pizza and playing Wii. He had been asking since yesterday morning how many more minutes until she came. Such a change from a couple years ago, when she'd have to distract him and we'd make a run for it! Josh and I enjoyed dinner and a dip in the hot pools - the actual hot ones and not the warm huge pool - since we were by ourselves for a change! :)

summertime, summertime, sum- sum- summertime

School officially ended for B-man and myself on Wednesday!! Josh has another week and it's kind of nice being in bed still while he gets up for work. :)

B had his preschool picnic yesterday. He had asked Josh if he could "please sneak out of work for a little bit" to come. And he did! B had fun playing with everyone, but then we had to eat lunch in the truck so the 40 mph wind wouldn't blow the chicken off our plates!

B then went back to school with Josh so I could go back to my school for meetings all afternoon. Literally, ALL AFTERNOON. First day of summer and my meetings lasted until 5:00! I made it home just in time to go to Josh's awards banquet, then brought B home before it ended and we both went to bed!

Now I'm wishing for some summer weather since it's summer vacation... it hasn't hit here yet and I'm wondering how long it will be until we can wear shorts outside and not freeze to death. :)

high as the sky

I had another proud SPD mommy moment last night:

We took a bike ride to the park last night before bedtime came. Brecken wanted to swing, which is a new thing recently. Josh put him in the baby-type swing because the other swings at the park are really big. Josh pushed Brecken higher and higher and was doing underdogs even. Brecken was swinging so high! And he was laughing so hard he was having a hard time breathing. (thank goodness he was in the baby-type swing!)

This time last year, the thought of just getting on the swing was enough to just about put Brecken in tears.

And instead of crying last night, he was laughing his sweet, beautiful laugh.

More heart swelling. :)

miracles

Brecken was so proud of his Mother's Day present he made me at school. When he brought them home last week, he even "hid" them so I had to go on a scavenger hunt of sorts to find them. (The card was laying on the side table and the flowers were on my chair!) He planted these flowers by himself. He told me they were Miracles (otherwise known as Marigolds). I thought that was especially fitting, since Brecken really is my own little miracle baby.

mother's day

I posted this on facebook this morning:

I am a sister and a daughter and a friend, but the title I am most proud of is MOMMY. It's even more sweet because of the struggle it took to get there. My little boy is the most perfect one in the world and I still get teary while thinking of my fight for him. Remembering all those moms-to-be who are still fighting that fight today.

I am beyond grateful to be able to celebrate Mother's Day. I know all too well the utter sadness that happens when someone wants to be a mother so bad but it just isn't happening. I'm keeping all my friends who are still fighting the fight in my prayers today, so that this might be their last Mother's Day with an empty lap.

On to something happier - my own Mother's Day today. What a great day we've had so far! I got breakfast in bed this morning, made by Brecken all by himself: a bowl of Cheerios and Fruity Pebbles mixed together by hand! I love that boy!

Then we all got dressed and went out back to take some pictures. Brecken refused to wear his plain white t-shirt because it's not one of his "regulars". So what did he do? He took a shirt that he's OK wearing, and wore it backwards so that it was only white on the front. That was his very own idea. And who am I to tell him no?

Then, we went on our first bike ride as a family. I realized that this summer I wasn't going to be able to push a stroller and walk fast for excercise, since strollers are no longer cool when you have a big boy bike. Going for walks was going to change - mainly in the pace we were going to be able to go! So for Mother's Day and Father's Day (yes, a little early), we bought Josh and I bikes. Now we are able to go on bike rides together! I haven't been on a bike in YEARS. I was quite proud of myself for remembering how. :)

For lunch, I got steaks from the BBQ and a salad.

Then Brecken and I made cookies.

Then we all went on another bike ride.

Then we came home and I ate cookies with cream poured over them. Because I can. :)

In a little bit, we are going to see the musical that our high school kids are putting on. I have 7 kids in it and Josh has a lot, too. So we're going to go see the matinee of it this afternoon.

Then come home and watch the finale of "The Amazing Race".

BESIDES all this.... it is so nice outside and I heard the first lawnmower of the season.

What could get better than this?!

it's totally ok for a grownup to go to bed at 7:30, right?

I can't remember the last time I didn't post for two whole weeks. Wow. I can't even really remember those two weeks happening, as I have been so dang busy! And it doesn't seem to be ending anytime soon. I have at least one thing (and sometimes two things or three things) happening every day until the end of school. I've had my district music festival, giving the ACT test at school, meetings upon meetings, two concerts coming up, more meetings, Josh being gone for classes, and today I got asked to be on the hiring committee for a new elementary teacher for next year. This is among other things that I can't remember right now, I'm sure. Thank goodness for my planner, that's all I've got to say!

Because of all this, I'm totally exhausted. Hence the two weeks between now and my last post. :( Josh and I were both asleep by 9:30 on a Friday night last week, and tonight I'm totally contemplating going to bed at the same time as Brecken does tonight. How funny is that- a 31 year old going to bed at 7:30!?

On a good note, I ran into one of Brecken's teachers tonight and she told me how nice Brecken is. Not just to a few people, to EVERYONE. She said she has never heard him say a mean word to ANYONE. I love that. I told him that makes me so proud of him. And it does. Could my heart swell any more?!

who are you and what did you do with my son??

Tonight, Brecken ASKED for a hair cut.

And instead of crying and being scared, he chatted with his daddy while it was happening.

And then I heard an explosion of GIGGLES because it tickled.

It TICKLED, it didn't "hurt".

My heart swelled. A hair cut has never happened like this before.

No wonder his OT is so proud of him. :)

play date

I went to pick up Brecken today and our babysitter, Val, had quite a story to tell me! I guess B's friend D asked if he and another friend, A, could go to D's house for a play date. (His very first "can Brecken come over and play"!!!!) Val asked B if he wanted to and he jumped at the chance. I think he hurt Val's feelings a little bit, that he didn't want to go home with her! Ha, ha!! She said she kept calling to check on him (she is friends with D's mom) and he had a great time. B told me all about how they played Mario and golf on the Wii (his most favorite games EVER!) and he even ate a whole grilled cheese sandwich! I'm amazed. TOTALLY amazed. This is quite a change in his routine that he craves, not to mention going out of his comfort zone which is soooo strong for him, and he did it. Willingly, and did great. I'm so proud. :)

going bananas

My sister got Brecken a "Grow Your Own Banana Tree" kit for Christmas this past year. It grows in a little plastic greenhouse indoors and then you can transplant it outside. Beings how we get snow a good 8-9 months out of the year, if this tree grows, we will be keeping the plant inside. :) We finally planted it yesterday. I've been putting it off because I was so afraid the draft from our big kitchen window, where it sits on the sill, would kill it this winter.

Brecken is beyond excited to see it grow. I sure hope it will sprout something so he's not disappointed! (hmm... I have an almost identical post HERE... complete with the same looking greenhouse!)

headphones

He must like them - we went to dinner last night with my parents. We went to a new restaurant, one we haven't been to before. He wanted carried in once we got to the door. (That's an SPD thing.) Then we got seated and he pulled the headphones out of my purse and put them on. It wasn't that noisy inside, but I quickly figured out that helped him focus for a few minutes so that he could feel safe. After about 5 minutes of wearing them, he took them off and was fine for the rest of the meal. (ate like a horse, even!)

Hooray!

so much noise

I've noticed an increasing irritation to noise in Brecken lately. Shortly after his concert night was Prom night. We went up to see the Grand March, where everyone shows off their fancy clothes. We had to leave before it even started because 100 different people, 100 different conversations at the same time made Brecken tell me it was way to noisy and he needed to leave. And yesterday at Wal-mart. Two different times his hands flew up to his ears and he started wimpering about the noise level. One time was from a populated area of the store where there were a lot of people talking. The other time was when a squeaky cart came behind us. We had to stop and let it pass so Brecken's eyes could not be so wide and his hands could come off his ears. I feel bad for my boy. And I'm not sure why the increase in noise-related irritations all of a sudden. I'll have to talk to his OT about it after Spring Break. I'm on the lookout for some cord-free headphones for him to wear in instances like this. And especially for when we go to Disney World, where there is a LOT of noise to overrun his senses. Hopefully we can find some that will work for him. I'm in the process of doing some research on different SPD sites! If anyone here has some suggestions, I'll be glad to entertain them! edited to add: I have no idea why this won't put proper paragraphs in when I hit "publish". Sorry it's so annoying to read.

SPD at it's finest

Brecken had his very first school concert tonight. He has been so excited about it for weeks. He's been practicing his songs at home. We have been talking about what to wear for a long time now (since clothes are a big deal to him) and had an outfit all picked out. They practiced on the stage with the lights today during school so they all knew what to expect and he was glad for that.

Tonight we get ready. We brushed him first. Then he puts on the pants and that's OK. (they're "dressy" pants lined with cotton like sweat pants.) He gets on his new shoes. Has a freak out. The tongue was touching his ankle and wouldn't stay away. So he ended up wearing Crocs.

We get out his polo shirt he was going to wear. Couldn't even get it near him. Nope, not going to happen. We finally get him in a long sleeved T-shirt even though he doesn't want to wear it.

We get there and he freaks. Clung to me hard. Wouldn't let me put him down. I had to hand him off to his teacher bawling. Broke my heart, but sometimes after I'm out of sight, he calms down.

Nope. Teacher came to get me to come get him. He refused to go out on stage. So he sat with Josh and I and watched his classmates. After every song, I asked if he wanted to go up there and I'd stay right in front so he could see me at all times. Nope, he couldn't do it.

So we just got home and he changed clothes immediately and then crawled up on my lap. He said, "Mommy, I really wanted to sing, I just couldn't do it. It made my brain hurt." Totally breaks my heart and I'm trying not to let him see me cry. I feel soooo bad that he was so excited and then his little brain just couldn't get over all the sensory stuff surrounding him. He was the only kid that couldn't do it.


At least he wore the pants, right?

:(

wonderfully lazy

What a wonderfully lazy day we've had today. We slept in (well, Josh and I did... Brecken woke up at his normal weekday time but was content snuggling in with us and watching cartoons...), ate a late breakfast, got to play outside for a while before we got too cold (but heck- we had to take advantage of the fact that there was no snow today!), watched more cartoons, wrestled downstairs, watched more cartoons, decided to finally get dressed mid-afternoon, made a cherry pie, and that's about it. I'm sure there will be more cartoons to finish out the day.

Ahhh... I love lazy days. Especially when we are all together as a family. Love that!

trip to australia

I found this today, and it totally hit home.


Deciding to have a baby is like planning a trip to Australia. You’ve heard it’s a wonderful place; you’ve read many guidebooks and feel certain that you’re ready to go. Everyone you know has traveled there by plane. They say it can be a turbulent flight with occasional rough landings, but you can look forward to being pampered on the trip. So you go to the airport and ask the ticket agent for a ticket to Australia. All around you, excited people are boarding planes for Australia. It seems there’s no seat for you; you’ll have to wait for the next flight. Impatient, but anticipating a wonderful trip, you wait---and wait---and wait. Flights to Australia continue to come and go. People say silly things like, “Relax. You’ll get on a flight soon.” Other people actually get on the plane and then cancel their trip, to which you cry, “It’s not fair!” After a long time, the ticket agent tells you, “I’m sorry, we’re not going to be able to get you on a plane to Australia. Perhaps you should think about going by boat.” “By BOAT!” you say. “Going by boat will take a very long time and it costs a great deal of money. I really had my heart set on going by plane.” So you go home and think about not going to Australia at all. You wonder if Australia will be as beautiful if you approach it by sea rather than by air. But you have long dreamed of this wonderful place, and finally you decide to travel by boat. It is a long trip, many months over many rough seas. No one pampers you. You wonder if you will ever see Australia. Meanwhile, your friends have flown back and forth to Australia two or three more times, marveling about each trip. Then one glorious day, the boat docks in Australia. It is more exquisite than you ever imagined, and the beauty is magnified by your long days at sea. You have made many wonderful friends during your voyage, and you find yourself comparing stories with others who also traveled by sea rather than by air. People continue to fly to Australia as often as they like, but you are able to travel once, perhaps twice. Some say things like, “Oh, be glad you didn’t fly. My flight was horrible; traveling by sea is so easy.” You will always wonder what it would have been like to fly to Australia. Still, you know God blessed you with a special appreciation of Australia, and the beauty of Australia is not the way you get there, but in the place itself.

Author Unknown

he's gonna be awesome

I talked to B's speech teacher while she was at my school today. She said, "I hear congratulations are in order!" I asked why, and she said that Brecken had told her we were getting a new baby. She asked him (knowing my history of infertility) if his mommy was pregnant or if we were adopting, and he proudly told her we were adopting. And that he hoped he got a little brother.

I love that boy.

I didn't even know he was telling people - ha! I don't mind at all - I just didn't realize just HOW excited he was, that he was telling his teachers! I'm now wondering how many people around town are hearing a rumor about me having a baby... :)

She said he's going to be an awesome big brother because he's so gentle and kind. Josh and I knew that already, but it's always nice to hear it from someone else. :) She thanked me for having such a wonderful child.

My heart burst with pride. :)

the imagination

My son has the best imagination. He came up with the best stories this afternoon.

It all started with him telling me that the girls' game was done, (the girls lost, apparently... 21-7) so he had to go now because it was his turn. He got his basketball and went all over the house dribbling it and playing a game. They were playing "mommy's school's team". B's team (the Pan.thers, of course) kicked the snot out of them, 91-10. :)

Then he had to play another team. They played a team we watched this weekend at State Basketball. A very, very good team. This team has one particular player that may or may not have scored 51 points by himself when they played Josh's team this year. Brecken found a medal that Josh had, and awarded it to himself after the "game" was over because he did so well at blocking this player's 3-point shots. He even named him by name (but I'm not going to post it here so it can't be found in a google search!).

He did this all afternoon. I love the imagination he has!

the check's in the mail

Finally, finally, after a very long time and a few emails to our social worker who is helping to nudge things along since they seem to be taking so long at the office, we got our invoice for our home study in the mail today. This is big, because apparently (and they failed to tell us this before hand so it could be a "surprise") they will not show your profile to anyone (and that includes online) until you pay for your home study. Which is fine, but they wouldn't send us the bill!!

Now we have it, Josh can call on Monday and (hopefully) pay over the phone, and we'll expect our profile book to be on the coffee table (or whatever they do with it) that afternoon. :)

bilingual

Brecken: I know what "dinner" is in Spanish.
Josh: Oh yeah? What?
Brecken: SUPPER!

Brecken: My knees are shivering.
Kara: They are?
Brecken: Yeah, that's Spanish for "they are cold".

my valentine

a smell

Brecken: Do you smell something funny in here?
Me: No... what does it smell like?
Brecken: Something in the microwave, maybe. Like deer poop or something.

(Don't ask me why he thinks we've ever had deer poop in our microwave!!!)

officially waiting

Our home study process is DONE! So excited. And it's a bit surreal!

We went to our SW's house in Laramie last night after Josh's game. We were supposed to meet with her at 7:00, but it took an hour longer to get there than we had thought, because of weather. Even though we left at 5:00, the 90 minute trip took so long we didn't get there until almost 7:30!

Last night's interviews were the one-on-one interviews where Donna asked us about our family growing up, what we liked to do, all those "personal" things. While one of us with her, the other one was in her downstairs living room with B playing with the toys she keeps on hand for her grandkids- Brecken thought that was great fun and wanted to stay the night there. :)

We stayed overnight at a hotel, then this morning got up and went to Kinkos to get our profile book printed and bound (holy expensive!!!) so we could drop them off with Donna. We signed our names on our "Dear Birthparents" letter, and we had Brecken sign his name on them all, too. Who can't resist a 4-year old's signature? ;)

This morning's interview was together as a family, about our parenting style, religion, stuff like that. It was only an hour long.

Brecken loves Donna- he keeps caling her "that grandma". I'm totally impressed with her too- love her. She gave us hugs before we left today and I thanked her so much for letting us invade her house on a weekend to get this done.

So. Now we wait. Hopefully not too long, but I'll try to get my head prepared for the long haul so I'm not disappointed.

too cold for comfort

Woke up to a temperature of 22 degrees below zero, with a 36 below zero wind chill. It was still 18 below zero when I came home from work. My poor car didn't like being outside all day- it sounded terrible when I started it to come home! I'm glad it started! It's supposed to be even colder tonight- it's going to make getting up tomorrow morning super hard!

I did the math, and at 5:00 tonight Honolulu was 20 degrees warmer outside in Honolulu than it is inside my house currently. And if you compare actual air temps, Honolulu was 98 degrees warmer. Where do I sign up for my plane tickets? (It has gotten colder- 25 degrees below zero right now!)

mission: accomplished

I love our social worker! She's fantastic. She's about my mom's age, she said she's a grandma, so when Brecken was being a total show off, she just laughed at him. He was the one to give her the grand tour of the house. He was quite proud. :)

She asked us all the standard questions, said she loved the story of how we met, asked what we did around town, what we liked about where we lived, stuff like that. She asked about the fire extinguisher and the locks and the outlet plugs.

We talked about race and gender and all that sort of stuff. Brecken said he wanted a baby brother. :) She was here for two hours and we had a lot of laughs. She's great. She asked if we'd be ready for a baby as soon as the home study was completed (the three interviews- not just today) and we said yes, and she said she has seen that happen. We're not getting our hopes up, but wouldn't that be wild if it happened like that?!?

AND... here is the best part. We still have to have two interviews. She said we are more than welcome to go to where she lives (1.5 hours away) on a night, have the one-on-one interviews, and then stay the night at a hotel and then the next morning get the 3rd interview done and we'd be certified! AND, she'd totally do a weekend. YES! So Saturday Feb. 5th, after Josh's game that afternoon, we'll head over, do the one-on-ones, and then the next morning be finished! Hooray!

She disclosed to us that she knows one of our references. I thought it was cool- one of Josh's good friends from growing up is a minister, and he actually was the one that married us. She goes to his church! She loves him and thinks he's great. One point for us. :)

I'm soooo glad it went well today. Huge lift off my shoulders. Not that I ever thought it would go badly, but you know how it goes.

eeek!!!

Tomorrow: BIG DAY!!! Social worker sounds nice, but you know how it is- someone important coming over to your house and your house will never seem clean enough. All the books say "they won't do a white glove test", and "they aren't expecting your house to be ready for a photoshoot for Better Homes and Gardens"... but let's face it. You don't want to look like a slob, either.

I had asked for a half day off tomorrow, since she is scheduled to arrive at 2:00 p.m. My secretary thought I said a WHOLE day. Turns out, it's a blessing in disguise. I can drop my boy off at preschool AND pick him up, which is something I never get to do. Plus, I get 3 uninterrupted hours to do all the last minute picking up, sweeping, vacuuming, hiding the crap (!), and all that grand old stuff, before she gets here. Maybe I won't feel so rushed. Or maybe I'll just have that extra time to get scared.

Either way. I'm nervous.

home study: scheduled

Wednesday is the big day.

I'm so nervous.

Must get my house cleaner than ever!

I've spent the past two days doing nothing but hanging out with my boy while Josh was away for basketball. Have to get it all in now, as tomorrow will be my turn to leave. It's time for our annual All-State Music Conference, and it's a long trip this time- all the way up to Cody! Then I ahve to stay because I have a meeting in Jackson on Thursday- so I won't get to see either of my boys until Thursday night. :(

So yesterday and today, B and I did laundry, vacuumed, (he helped with both!), went to the lake to see the ice fishing derby all set up, he had a couple baths, blew bubbles, we watched PLENTY of cartoons, and we pigged out on junk. It was a good two days. :)

scooters in the snow

It's tough to be a kid in Wyoming, where you have so much snow all the time. Especially when your birthday falls right when it's getting ready to start being winter, and anything you get for your birthday and Christmas that might be an outside toy can't be played with! The past two Christmases, Brecken has gotten some great riding toys- a big boy bike (last year) and a scooter (this year). The poor kid tried riding it in the snow the other day and realized how hard it is. :(

Enter: DADDY'S SCHOOL! We're very fortunate to be able to load up B's stuff and take him to Josh's school so he can ride around the hallways and the multi-purpose room. We did that today so that he could run around a big area and use his scooter too. It is a great option for the winter and it makes me very glad we have that building available to us. :)

amazing progress

Brecken showed amazing progress with his sensory disorder over Christmas vacation. I'm so dang proud of him.

*He tried 3 new foods, and loved 2 of them. (Potato Oles from Taco Johns and garlic bread were the fantastic discoveries- he SCARFED them down after trying both of them on two different days! Stuffing, on the other hand, he was not a fan of. But heck- he tried them!!!)

*He wore "dress" pants to Christmas Eve service. They were not sweat pants, but had sweat material inside. But they were new, different, and he wore them.

*My sister gave him some brown cords that were too small for my nephew, and he wore them ALL DAY!!!

*Then, my mom got him two new t-shirts that she found, and he wore one of them! I was so proud of him.

*He went sledding! He was extremely timid at the beginning, but by the time we left my parents' house, he was going to the top of the "mountain" and taking a running start!

*AND, he let us finally give him a hair cut.

Small steps, but they are HUGE steps to us.

Interesting, however, that he won't wear the new clothes to school. He doesn't want anyone to see them. Baby steps.

He was still quite clingy to us when we got to each of our parents' houses- enough that our families noticed. He warmed up quickly though, which was a relief. He didn't have a ton of issues with the noise this time around, which was good since it was PLENTY noisy this Christmas. :)

So proud of my little guy!

See? New pants and a new sweatshirt, too!

rudolph

We had a visitor at our house this Christmas season. An elf was sent to us from the North Pole to watch over Brecken and report back to Santa each night how the day went. Then he'd come back before we woke up and hide in the house somewhere.

I didn't order him so much to help with behavior, as we have a pretty well behaved child to begin with. But I knew this elf would hold so much magic, and this year has been the most magical since Brecken has been with us. His eyes widen in wonder and he gets so dang excited about everything- so I knew this elf would be the perfect addition to our Christmas traditions. Brecken would get out of bed every morning so excited to go elf hunting. B would tell him when we left for school to have a good day, and would tell him "Good night! Have a safe trip!" every evening. Rudolph (what Brecken named his elf, though he mainly called him "my buddy") stayed through Christmas Day, even arriving at my mom and dad's house, and then flew back to the North Pole until next December. Brecken is so sad- he misses his little friend.

(you can get more information about the elves here)

bravery

If you know my son, you know this was a big thing for him. I almost cried, I was so proud of him.

letters

Brecken wrote a letter to Santa last week during school. The class then walked down to the post office and put them in the mail box that goes to the North Pole. He was soooo excited that Santa was going to get his letter in the mail! And today, Santa came to school to personally deliver letters back to them!

Dear Santa,

For Christmas I want a train with wheels that drive backwards by itself, a frisbee, and a Mater that you pull back and it moves by itself.

Love, Brecken

Dear Brecken,

Thank you for writing to me this year. I really enjoy getting letters from your school. Your teachers are very nice to help you write your letters to Santa. Did you know Santa has to answer thousands of letters each year? My typing is getting better but sometimes I still make mistakes.

The elves were really excited to read your letter and they have picked out something very special for you this year. I was excited to read your letter too because Mater is one of my favorite toys. I like Lightning McQueen but Mater is the best. I love his cool teeth and I love to hear him talk.

The reindeer are really busy practicing their flying. They will have to fly faster than Lightning McQueen can drive in order for us to make the trip around the world and to get all the presents delivered. We have a very long trip.

Be good and I will see you on Christmas Eve with a very special gift from everyone here at the North Pole.

Love,
Santa

you're never going to believe it!

BRECKEN SAT ON SANTA'S LAP TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had my elementary program tonight. It went really well! Afterwards, Santa came. Brecken came running down the bleachers right to me so we could get in line. I was shocked. He told Josh and I in line that he was just going to say hi to him, not sit on his lap. Because Santa already knew what he wanted, since he wrote him a letter at school. We said that was fine. Well, he got up there, and Santa kind of just picked him up and put him on his lap, and B did NOT freak out!!!!! I was almost too shocked to get a picture!! I was so proud of him! What a change in my little guy from a few weeks ago!

They wrote letters to Santa at school the other day, and today they took a walking field trip to the post office to mail them in the special mailbox. Brecken is so excited that Santa will be getting his letter soon. I love the magic of Christmas. :)

brushing

I picked Brecken up this afternoon and we met his OT at the preschool so she could teach me how to use the Wilbarger Brushing Protocol she has been using on Brecken since his diagnosis. She's seen great results out of it with him, which I was very proud of! I now know how so I can do it at home with Brecken. I'll show Josh too, so that we can both do it. (He couldn't come with me today because of basketball practice.) I'm excited to try it before bedtime to see if bedtime goes better, and definitely before basketball games (which start tomorrow!!) because of all the noise, etc. She told me I could do it as often as every two hours, and I now have a couple of the brushes at home. Here is a little bit more info on it for those who want to read about it!

http://www.thetherapyplace.net/newsletter/3_2.htm

It's hard to explain. We have a brush, it's a surgical brush. (Which is easily replaced at low cost- hooray! Especially if Aunt Kristen can get us some! :)) After it's used for a while, you have to replace it because the bristles will wear down and won't be as effective because they aren't stiff enough.

There's a certain way to brush up and down his arm, using a certain amount of pressure and not letting the brush come up at all. After you get every inch of skin you can, then you go it real fast on his palm, about 3 or so swishes. Then you put the brush down and "hug" his fingers. It's like pushing (lightly, but with pressure) the knuckle toward the hand, on each finger. Then you brace the arm and push his wrist toward his elbow a couple times. Then the elbow toward the shoulder. Then you repeat on the other arm. And then the legs and feet. And "hug" his toes, ankles, knees, and hips. And then you brush his back. Then after his back, you brace his back and push (again lightly, but with pressure) on his head. And push his sternum toward his back.

It's very hard to explain and this is the abbreviated version.

So proud of my little man! We weren't sure he was going to let the teachers touch him- he's very guarded about that stuff- but he now searches for his teacher that does it in the mornings, when he gets there, so he can have his special time with her!!

While we were in the OT office, he was playing with some rubber spikey things and was putting them on his feet, which shocked me. The OT quietly told me that was a new development just this week. So he's growing in that sense! Hooray!!

forward movement

Things are finally moving forward again in the adoption process. The "week to 10 days" it was going to take to review our application turned into over 3 weeks. However, word has been trickling in from our fantastic references that they have been receiving the letters from the Society. And they have a deadline, apparently, to write a letter for us and have it back to the Society. In addition to that, we have received our second packet from them, with MORE questions to answer ("were you able to confide in your mom and dad?" "tell us specific amounts and frequency of how much alcohol you drink", etc) and instructions on how to get fingerprinted.

Wee-haw, here we go! :)

getting organized

We got to spend a weekend at home for once. It seems like we haven't been home for a weekend in a very, very long time. And because of that, our house is a disaster. A huge disaster. And sometime in the future, we are going to have a home study done, so we need to get organized. Fast.

So today was it.

We managed to get a lot done!! We got into the middle bedroom, where we keep all the baby stuff and other things that kind of get thrown in there. It is now all set up. We even set up the crib, finding out that we are missing a couple of the bolts. Hopefully we can order new hardware for it! I'm glad we discovered that now, rather than later when we actually need the crib!

While we were at it, we rearranged the living room. That's the best way to clean because it forces us to move the furniture. Gross! And since we were moving around furniture, we decided to make more space upstairs and move the piano downstairs. Josh had a couple students and one of our friends come over and help him get it down there.

That's the exciting life we had today- but it was so nice to be able to stay home for once!

a fish funeral

I had my very first fish funeral tonight. We came home yesterday to find Fishio was no longer swimming. I didn't know what to tell Brecken, so we waited until this afternoon after school to tell him. My poor baby cried. Hard. He's so broken hearted, it made me cry right along with him. He wanted to bury Fishio in the back yard under the plants, so after Josh came home from practice, we did that. Brecken wondered if we could get Fishio back after he felt better and we wiped the dirt off him from being buried. :( The poor kid got teary-eyed every time he thought of Fishio tonight. Poor baby. :(

grandma peewee

Edna “Peewee” Sandlian
Modified: Friday, Nov 12th, 2010

Edna Sandlian

July 8, 1933 – November 9, 2010

Funeral services for Edna “Peewee” Sandlian, 77, will be held at 1 p.m. Friday, Nov. 12, 2010, at the First Wyoming United Presbyterian Church with the Rev. Steven Seng officiating. Burial will follow in the Valley View Cemetery. Edna died Nov. 9, 2010, at Community Hospital in Torrington. Memorials may be made to the Special Touch Program at Community Hospital, the American Cancer Society, or the donor’s choice. Visitation will be Thursday from 3 p.m. to 7 p.m. at the funeral home and the casket will be open at the church prior to the service. Arrangements are under the direction of the Colyer Funeral Home and friends may send condolences to the family at www.colyerfuneralhome.com.

Edna was born July 8, 1933, at the family home northwest of Yoder, the daughter of Henry and Ella (Prentice) Garrelts. She grew up and received her education in Yoder graduating in 1951. She married Dale Sandlian on July 20, 1952. They farmed near Yoder for a short time before moving to Torrington. She drove school bus and enjoyed driving the sports trips. She started delivering rural mail part and then went to full-time in the mid 1980s. She retired from there.

Edna enjoyed bowling, playing bridge, golfing, and traveling the world with friends. She was a member of the Torrington Country Club, the Wyoming Rural Carriers Association, and the South Goshen Presbyterian Church.

Edna will be dearly missed by Dwayne and Jacquie Sandlian of Torrington, and their family; children, Summer and Eric, Beki and Josh, Daniel and Tiffany, Jessica and Mike, John, Tessa, Steffie, and Beth; grandchildren, Natalie, Anna, Molli, Emma, Caylie, and Caleb; Craig and Lennie Sandlian of Lingle and their family; children Joshua and Kara, Joel and Annie, and Jeffrey and Beth; grandchildren Karlee, Trevor, Hailey, Brecken and Bryell; Bryan and Anne Sandlian of Cheyenne and their family; children Jessica and Mike, and Mark; grandchildren Brayden and Lyla; brother Alvin “Sonny” Garrelts of Yoder; sister Anna Mae McElheny of Torrington; niece, nephews, and many close friends.

She was preceded in death by her parents; her husband; two brothers; one sister; and one great-grandchild Kaylin Sandlian.

chicago

We made the fastest trip ever to Chicago this weekend for my grandma's funeral. It was a really great weekend, even though we were only there for one full day! EVERYONE from my family was able to make it, which I find amazing- we are spread out from FL to WA, to NY to CA, to WY, MN, and IL... and we haven't all been together in years. YEARS. It was so great to see all my family, even if the head lady wasn't there. :(

All of my grandma's great grandchildren together for the first time:
Myself with all my cousins- I think the last time we were together was when I turned 18:

Me and my family. :)

Josh, B, and I:

The whole family:

here we go!

Here it is- our GOOD news. The past month has been filled with nothing but horrible news, it seems, so I'm excited to say that today I have great news.

We're going to adopt!

We got the application packet a few weeks ago. We finally got all the information gathered and our autobiographies written and reference list put together, and pictures ordered and marriage license photocopied, and got it all ready to mail in today, and I did. And as I left the post office, I was a litte bit giddy- that must mean it's the right thing to be doing right now! And when I got back from the post office, I emailed an adoptive mother who has graciously opened her email inbox to us, to let her know it was done. And she wrote back,

"I know what you mean...the giddiness of "expecting" is pure Heaven!"



and I realized that's what it is- we're expecting.



Hip, Hip, Hooray!