love

My B-man always promises me that he will always tell me he loves me, even when he's 14. Tonight I asked if I could make a "movie" of him saying that, so I have proof for later. So we did. I'll try to figure out how to add this movie into this blog, but I do want to type out the conversation, too. (So when I put this blog into a book, I'll still have record of it. :) )

Me: Are you always going to love me?
B: I'm always going to love you.
Me: Always always?
B: Yes!
Me: And when you're 14, will you let me give you a hug in front of your friends?
B: Yes.
Me: And give you a kiss on the cheek?
B: Yes.
Me: Always?
B: Yes.
Me: Promise?
B: Yes!

He then had to make a movie of me promising the same stuff. Only, the conversation was a bit different:

B: Mom, are you always going to love me?
Me: I'm always going to love you.
B: Even when I'm 20?
Me: Even when you're 20, I'm going to love you.
B: Even if I make friends, you'll love me?
Me, trying not to laugh: Even if you make friends, buddy, I'm always going to love you.

Our hearts are full of love. :)

I've been terrible about blogging lately. I used to do 1-2 posts a week, and lately has slowed to 1-2 times a month. I feel like I have nothing new to blog about, yet we've been extremely busy. I think the busy has just been what we do every day, so it's nothing "new", and we've gotten so used to it that it's not exciting anymore. If that makes any sense.

Basketball season is about to wind down. Senior night is on Tuesday. I hate senior night. I hate saying goodbye to the seniors I've watched grow and learn and change for the past 4 years. Especially this year's seniors. I feel like I've gotten quite attached to them, even though I don't interact with them very often. I always hate their last home game, because I want them to be able to stay for forever. I know, however, that they need to move on and grow their wings even more in college... but I wish I could be selfish and keep them. :)

Brecken and I made rice krispy treats for the boys on Josh's team today. He decorated them with frosting smiley faces, too. He loves those boys even more than I do. I am so lucky that Josh's kids embrace B as "one of the team". They are so nice to him - always greeting him when he comes to practice, always looking out for him ("heads up, Brecken - ball coming!"), always have a smile or a high 5 for him... what great kids.

We're finally getting some snow today. It's been snowing for the past couple hours now. Hope it keeps up. As much as I complain about the snow, we haven't had any of any significance yet this year, and I fear a drought this summer!

change is a'comin'

Some of our teacher friends had a baby last week. Last Sunday at church, we pulled up and saw their car and I was sad for them - I knew how badly the mom wanted to have the baby that weekend - in fact, she had had a doctor's appointment the Friday before and she was really hoping they'd just keep her there. So I told her I was kind of sad to see her at church, and she said it was OK, because there was an end in sight - they were going to induce her that coming Wednesday. She said she was done working, and that she was going to keep her 2 year old home too, and spend time just the two of them, because it would never be that way again.

And then it hit me. Any night we have, could, in theory, be the last night we have as a family of 3. We might get a call one day to come get our baby, without warning, and *POOF*, our family of 3 is gone. Now, don't get me wrong, that's what we're hoping and praying for. But at the same time, it's going to be a huge adjustment to become a family of 4.

One one hand, I hope it does turn out that way, because I'm the sort that would dwell for weeks, knowing the day was coming, and turn it into a sob fest of "9 more days of just me and my B-man"... and not enjoy any of it. If it just happens, it's done and over with and I don't have time to dwell and be sad. (AND REALLY - It's what we're hoping and praying for - but any of you parents of more than one child know what I mean! Change can be hard. Especially since we've been a family of 3 for over 5 years now! But trust me when I say that yes, we are very, very excited.)

On the other hand, I really want to enjoy the last days of us being a family of 3. Quality time. Special time. Time we won't be able to go back to once our baby is here with us.

I guess we'll treat each day as our "last day" of being a family of 3. It will be special. It will be bonding. It will be memory making. And if our baby doesn't find us for another year, we'll have a year full of great times. As a family of 3.

locker room

We have quite the athlete in the family. Brecken will take a basketball and play a game in the house, all day long. It's fantastic. He's usually the Panthers, and he plays a different team every time. The other day, he was playing the Lions. He would run around the house dribbling, shooting, and shouting, "SCORE!"

Then he disappeared into the bathroom for about 5 minutes. We never heard a flush, so when he came out, Josh asked him what he was doing in there. The answer?

"That's my locker room and it was halftime."

Duh.

:)

i suck.

Here it is, January 20, 2012, and it's the first blog of the year. Wow. I suck at blogging this year.

In my defense, holy moly has time flown. We've been so busy. Basketball is in full swing. We had homecoming at my school and that was a nutso week. I left this past Sunday for our state music conference and got home Wednesday afternoon, just in time to have to go to school for P/T Conferences all evening. Repeat the next night. Last night - migraine city. Started right before bed. I went to sleep, as that usually helps a lot. Enter waking up because of pain. Take some meds. Fall asleep. Wake up again. Put pain patch on shoulder/neck as those muscles are on fire because of the migraine. Fall asleep. Rinse and repeat. All.night.long. Wake up with migraine still this morning. Thank goodness we didn't have school today!!

My boy and I got to snuggle all day today. I loved that. I missed him this week - from Sunday afternoon until this morning, I saw him for a total of 40 waking minutes. I don't like that! So today was a planned snuggle day anyway, and because I wasn't feeling well, it was really a snuggle day! We were lazy and loved every minute of it. I was feeling better by this afternoon finally, so he and I went to my school to watch some junior high girls basketball action. Then came home and ate pizza. Fun date night with my boy while Daddy was at an away game.

Up for tomorrow: We get to go see Daddy's game! Wahoo!

2011

What a year!

* We completed a home study for Wyoming Children's Society. That included 3 sets of interviews with a social worker, a home inspection, letters of reference, fingerprinting, background checks through the Wyoming Department of Criminal Investigations, several tears, and a lot of money.

* Josh and I had our 7th anniversary. It's been a wonderful 7 years!

* We took Brecken to his first pro baseball game, the Colorado Rockies!

* We went to Disney World with my whole family and had a fantastic time.

*Brecken started his last year of preschool; something that is very bittersweet to me!

*Brecken turned 5 years old. That was hard. That means he really is a big boy instead of a little boy.

* We took Brecken to his first UW football game, where the Cowboys played Nebraska.

*Josh landed himself a new position in our school district, as the District Science Facilitator. He really enjoys it!

* Josh's football team went to the playoffs for the first time in 4 years!

* We celebrated Christmas at Thanksgiving with Josh's family, something I've never done, but worked out very nicely since everyone was home!

* We had two new nieces born - Brenna Allie and Cameron Cate.

* Josh finished his principal endorsement! He worked so hard and we're very proud of him.

* We flew to Minnesota for Christmas at my sister's. We've never been there for Christmas and it was fun!

leaving on a jet plane

That song goes through my head every time we travel!

We had a fantastic Christmas. The whole family went to Minnesota to my sister's house. I wondered if we were going to make it... Wed the 21st is when we got out of school so we headed to the airport that night. Right in the middle of a storm. It took a good 5 hours to get to Denver but we made it. We stayed the night at a hotel since our plane left at 7:00 the next morning.

The next morning, it was still snowing. Hard. However, we still were able to get out of town after an hour delay so we could get de-iced for 45 minutes! That's some serious de-icing! We made it to Minneapolis and we're glad we did... we heard the Denver Airport was canceling flights after we left!

That afternoon, my sister took B and I to get Josh's present from B. B had put a lot of thought into it and bought him a purple shirt (school color) and a t-shirt to wear to basketball practice. I thought that was a very thoughtful gift!

My nephew Ryan had school on the 22nd still, so Brecken and my mom and I surprised him at the bus stop after school. He was so surprised!

That night we got to hang out as a family... my sister, my BIL, my nieces and nephew (including the new 8 week old that we got to meet for the first time!), my mom, my dad, and my grandma. I love that.

The 23rd was a fantastic day! My sister had found a babysitter to stay with the kids and we adults (and the baby) went out to breakfast at the wonderful Machine Shed restaurant. YUM-O. Afterwards, we had a whole day of adult shopping at the Mall of America! NO KIDS to haul around and have hollering "Can I have that?!" :) It was a great day and we had a lot of fun. That night, Brecken had asked if he could cook dinner for everyone, so he (we) did! I thought that was awesome that he requested to cook one of his favorite meals for everyone.

Christmas Eve was busy with cooking and baking and playing. And Kristen and David dealing with plumbing problems. The drains were all backing up due to a clog somewhere. It turned from the shower drain throwing up to it spilling over any time the water ran anywhere in the house... so the plumber was called and my dad stayed home during church to let them in so we could use the water when we got back. :) We got dressed up for church that afternoon and I almost cried when my boy wore brown cords and a red sweater. He looked so incredibly handsome. Granted, he took it off IMMEDIATELY when we got home, but he made it through church! We came home and had a delicious dinner of pork ribs. The kids got to open one present that night - Christmas jammies - before filling up a cup of milk, some treats, and reindeer food before we all went to bed.

Christmas was amazing! Santa brought B a Buzz Lightyear bed tent, a REAL digital camera, a Cars placemat, Cars 2 movie, Cars Wii game, and a Veggietales movie. We all got spoiled with lots of fantastic presents and everyone had a great time!

The 26th, Josh had to come home so he could get ready for a tournament his team went to. We went to the Mall of America that afternoon again and Josh rode the shuttle from the mall to the airport while the rest of us went to dinner for my dad's birthday. There was a huge fight that broke out right where we had JUST walked through... people arrested, 200 teens involved, the mall on lock down for a bit... I'm very glad we didn't know it was happening since we had JUST gotten upstairs for dinner!

The 27th, the kids stayed home again and my mom, my sister, my grandma, the baby, and I went to Stillwater for some shopping. What fun stores they had there! We went to an olive oil store... that's all they sell is olive oil! I brought Josh some garlic EVOO from that store. We also found a fantastic kitchen store, and some really fun boutiques. Great day again!

The 28th B and I flew home. I always hate saying goodbye to my nieces and nephew... I don't know when we'll see them again and they'll change so much while we're gone! :( Brecken had an amazing time playing with them.

Thanks for having us, Kristen! It was a super fun Christmas, that's for sure!

the house

My B-man made a gingerbread house at school this week. It looked good enough to eat. Which he did. AFTER I got to take pictures. :)

the tree

We didn't get to go to the mountains for a tree last year. Josh had basketball on Saturdays and the one Sunday we could have gone, he had a class out of town. I was so sad. We had to buy a tree instead. It just wan't the same and I was so hoping we would get to get back to the mountain this year.

And we made it! We got our annual B-with-daddy and B-with-mommy pictures (since there has only been one year when there was someone else with us, to take a family picture!) and had a fantastic time. The last time we went, B was three, and he cried the whole time. This year, he took the idea and ran with it. He insisted HE pick out the tree. (Though, that didn't quite happen.) He insisted HE be the line leader through the snow that was hip high on him in spots. He insisted on playing hard in it, despite the fact his mittens were wet and cold. He had a total blast.

And when we got it all decorated (again, he insisted HE put on all the ornaments, or at least point to a branch that may have been to high for him), I asked if he loved it. He said, "Not exactly." One more ornament and it was much better, ready to be loved for the month.

so behind

I'm so far behind in blogging. I'm so sorry. I have a lot to talk about but it seems like there's no time to write it down!

So I can come back to it later and remember, and so you know that yes, I have been busy, here's what I still need to tell you:

* Went to District Clinic with my kids for two days before Thanksgiving
* Came home to sleep in my bed for one night
* Went to Josh's parents' house for Thanksgiving.
* Everyone was home and we managed to find time to have Christmas then, too
* Went on a Black Friday middle of the night adventure with my MIL and one of my SIL's.
* Stayed a day late and came home yesterday so Josh could have a dr. appointment and I got to eat out for my birthday... a rare treat with basketball season in session now!
* Christmas programs are coming up!
* Josh's first games of the season are this weekend!

i'm sick and tired....

....of being sick and tired.

I've had a cold for two weeks now. They don't usually last this long, but I was thanking my lucky stars that it didn't happen sooner in the school year... It usually hits me much sooner than this!

And then I was cursing my stars that it happened when it did. I was in desperate need of finishing the teaching of my Christmas program songs so we can spend the next few weeks trying out for solos and polishing stuff up! And of course, I COMPLETELY lost my voice. Couldn't sing a single note for a good week.

And then my face hurt. Pretty bad. I was hoping it was just the cold working its way through my sinuses, but then one day, I started walking and that alone made my teeth feel like a hammer hitting them.

So a visit to the school nurse ensued. I told her my suspicions and she agreed: CALL THE DOCTOR.

I got in on Thursday afternoon this week and I was sooo excited to go. How sad is that? But I was feeling so awful. Diagnosis: My very first sinus infection ever. Lucky me.

I was hoping the antibiotics would work miracles and I'd feel better the next day, but no such luck. I did feel better yesterday, but all that meant was it didn't feel like my face was going to shatter into a million pieces.

I'm hoping I can get a great night's sleep tonight. Brecken was up bright and early this morning so that meant we all were too. And I felt terrible all morning. I did get a couple hour nap this afternoon though and I feel much better this evening. So hopefully I can get good sleep tonight, as I'm leaving tomorrow afternoon with some students for a trip to Cheyenne for a couple days for an honor choir and band clinic. I keep thinking back to 7 years ago, this SAME exact trip, and I came down with an allergic reaction to some antibiotic I was on, for something I can't even remember. But we got to Cheyenne on the bus and I broke out in head to toe hives so bad that someone asked how I had gotten so sunburned. I was hallucinating by the time we got home the next day. My teacher friend found a car and took me to Urgent Care where they diagnosed me with an allergy to sulfa drugs.

I'd rather not repeat that experience this year. :)

trucking along

We're trucking along here, at about a hundred miles an hour! Josh's football season is now over and it came just in time... I worked 12 hour days every day last week so it was nice to have Josh home because I'm not sure what we would have done with Brecken!

Monday was Halloween. I raced home from school and we took Brecken trick-or-treating downtown. Then we went home to scarf down some grilled cheese sandwhiches before heading to my school's Halloween Carnival. Brecken had a great time playing all the games! He did a great job. He didn't want to wear his costume, but he managed to do 40 minutes of the carnival without his headphones! He started to get hyper at the end of his time there, which for him, shows sensory stuff (that's how his body handles sensory overload), but he did a great job otherwise! He came home with lots of prizes, including a goldfish. He named him Goldie, but unfortunately, Goldie only lived until Thursday. I'm very glad I explained beforehand to Brecken that goldfish don't live a very long time, because it wasn't nearly as sad this time as when his beta died.

Josh and Brecken left the carnival early to come home and trick-or-treat. Brecken had written out a list of houses he wanted to go to, so of course, we had to fulfill the list!

Tuesday I had to take my kids to audition for all-state and didn't get home until 7:00, in the middle of a blizzard.

Wednesday and Thursday nights were parent-teacher conferences.

Friday, thankfully, was an early out for me! Hip, hip, hooray! We loaded up the car and went to see our new niece. She had turned a month old and we had yet to meet her. So we went to see them for the weekend. She's a beauty, that's for sure! Brecken had a great time playing with his cousin Bryell and holding baby Brenna. He's very proud of himself that he got Brenna to go to sleep. :)

Today I'm home with a sick little boy. We've been up with his sick since 6:00 and it's hard to believe it's only 8:00 now... seems we've been awake for many more hours!

love and marriage

"Mom, Sophie wants to marry me. So does Madison, though. And I have no idea which one to choose!" *big huge sigh*

tornado in my house

That's right, my house looks like a tornado went through it.

It's been worth it though... we've had some very fun and busy weekends lately!

A couple weekends ago we went to Lingle to bring my B-man to the pumpkin patch. We went through the corn maze, lauched tomatoes, played on the toy tractors, and came home with 95 pounds worth of pumpkin. Josh's mom and dad came with us and we had a great, great day! The weather was perfect and we had a fantastic time.

This past weekend, we went up North. Josh's last game of the regular season was a 6 hour drive (one way!) from here, but I didn't have school so B and I packed up and drove up there. On the way, we stopped and picked up my grandma and brought her with us. It was a big game... if we won, we'd make it to the playoffs for the first time in 4 years! And... WE WON! Brecken was so excited and was sure it sure it was because he wore his purple and gold sweatshirt and gold hat. :) We now have a playoff game this Friday. I will take a half day off and go too.

After the game, Josh got off the bus and we stayed the weekend with my grandma. It had been a long time since we've been there; it was long overdue! We had a great weekend there. We got our Christmas gift-giving list started at the Holiday Show there, we went to the museum to see the dinosaurs, walked to the park, and relaxed. It was fantastic!

With as busy as we've been, my house is a disaster..... I'm kind of looking forward to a weekend off to clean. How sick is that?!

noodles and butter

We had noodles and butter for dinner last night. Brecken got to choose. Here's why:

We had his annual IEP meeting after school yesterday. His teachers are so proud of him! He has gained a ton of confidence, he's not afraid to answer a question, give ideas, or play with kids. He's not not-finishing his work now, he's now getting it all done and does it quickly (but correctly), too. He's at his age level or ahead for academic skills. They said the only times he really prefers to play with the adults is at recess when he's wanting to play sports, and they are sure it's because the other kids don't have near the sport skills he does, so he doesn't want to play with them... they don't give him a challenge the teachers do. :) He is now one of the class leaders instead of a non-participant. SO glad to hear this.

He would test out of the speech part of his IEP because his goals have been met, but he can't receive OT services as a stand-alone Dx, so she's keeping him on speech with a little teeny goal. OT is going to keep working with him on fine motor skills like snapping and buttoning and holding his pencil right and hand strength, because it's kinda puny. His sensory goals have pretty much been met in the academic setting... they said he is doing EXCELLENT at being able to use the strategies the OT taught him to be able to better handle all the sensory stimuli. Home and other settings are another story but he's getting SO much better at learning how to handle them. (and really, I'd rather have him be able to hold it together at school than at home!) The things we are doing at home are just what we need to be doing and we'll continue to see improvement!

The OT told us something that we already knew but other people have trouble understanding. She said his SPD is something he will always have, it's not something you grow out of, you just learn how to handle it. Which he does... 9 times out of 10 now, he'll ask for his headphones instead of having a meltdown. So that's good! He will not "grow out of" this... he will always have it. It may come to where it isn't an issue anymore, because he has learned to deal with it completely, but he will still have it.

They are aware of his clothing issues and will work more on that... and they know about his bedtime stuff (and not sleeping in his room) and they said what we are doing is spot on and he'll get there eventually. It has to be done on his own time otherwise it won't happen because pushing him will make him regress. So that was nice to hear that we are doing things right. :) His OT did say that she uses him (without his name) in examples of what brushing can do for kids with SPD. I'm glad it works. :) He is NOT being brushed at school anymore and he's been fine. Yay! (Though she suggested we keep doing it at night and before new things, like we have been.) They assured me that we are right in being able to tell the difference between being naughty and having a sensory meltdown. There IS a difference and we are getting to be pros at knowing the difference. :) I kind of feel bad for others who don't see him all the time, because I'm sure it looks like he's the biggest brat. He's not, I promise. You can ask our OT if you don't believe me.

He will be re-tested in the spring to see what we need to do for the transition to Kindergarten.

So we told him we were very proud of him and let him pick dinner. So we had noodles and butter and sprinkle cheese. :)

(and just for comparison on how he was last year at this meeting... click here. It's quite a change!)

a sneak peek

Here is a sneak peek of our family photo shoot we did last weekend. Man, am I glad we went last weekend instead of this weekend... last weekend it was a beautiful 82 degrees. One week later, it was snowing. Hard. We lucked out on this one. :)

http://www.juststaceyj.com/2011/10/09/they-need-another/

Thank you, Stacey. They are beautiful. If your blog counter says a computer from here got on your blog 1000 times, its because I did. I can't stop staring at these. :)

snow

We had our first snow the other night.  *sigh*  The only one excited about it in our house is the B-man.  It is snowing huge fat flakes again today so he got out his snow pants, his new winter coat, his gloves, his hat and his snow boots (with thankfully fit still!) and he went out to play in it.  I think he ate more of it than he did play with it, though.  He can't wait until there is a bunch of dry snow (this snow is super wet!) so he can scoop it up in a bowl and eat it, which he has loved ever since when Amy babysat him and she introduced him to that snack.  :)

... and my heart swells

Last year at B's IEP meeting, they told us one of the big Sensory Disorder "aha" moments was when the kids tried different tastes and Brecken wouldn't even let them put anything on his plate.

Today, he told us that they tried a bunch of food at school today to see if it was sour or sweet or salty, AND they had to taste it with their eyes closed.

He tried them ALL. (and with his eyes closed, mind you!)

I sent his teacher a message on facebook, just to make sure, (because you know, kids have been known to remember things differently from time to time... haha!) and she replied with, "He absolutely did and we were all so excited - it was GREAT!" And then said they had so much fun today and he's having such a great year and is now one of the leaders in the class.

I'm SO PROUD OF HIM!!!! (and I won't lie, I got some happy tears in my eyes.)

He did NOT like:
Hot Tamales

Pickles

Lemons

Bitter Chocolate

But he LOVED:
salt

salty chips

pepper (this one surprised me!)

Way to go, my B-man!!!

five

We have a five year old.

I'm not sure how that happened.

I blinked, and he was no longer a baby, but a big boy.

And as he told me today, "See Mom? You didn't even cry about it."

We had a great weekend. We had a party for him yesterday. No family was available for a party this year, which was really odd. So we invited friends from school for the first time! We had a few kids running around, and his new babysitter, and a couple of our friends, and fun was had. This year, instead of a football cake, B-man wanted a basketball cake. Woo-hoo! I got to buy a new cake pan! :) (he had a football cake for his 1st, 3rd, and 4th birthdays!) He got a giant box of crayons, a coloring book, and a toy Lightning McQueen camera from his friend Sophie, a Lightning McQueen bowling set from some new friends (the dad is a new teacher at my school), a Play-Doh Cars set from his babysitter, and $10 from our friend and fellow coach and his wife. We had a football pinata filled with toys like green army men, plastic dinosaurs, plastic airplanes, etc. They all thought that was fun.

Today was about perfect. We woke up and B discovered his gift from Josh and I in the living room... a new Lightning McQueen bike! His 12" bike was getting too small, so he's now the proud owner of a new 16" one. He also got to open his cards he got in the mail... $5 from my mom and dad and $5 from Grandma Lou... put that together with what he got yesterday and the $5 he got from Josh's parents, the kid raked in $25 for his birthday! And said he's not spending it... he's saving it. For Disney World in 2014!)

After going out for breakfast, he got on his new bike and we headed to the park to play for a while. After he picked pizza for his birthday lunch, he and I played a couple games of Disney World Candy Land (from Aunt Kristen and Uncle David, which he also opened this morning!) while Daddy went to his football meeting. After the meeting though, we all got to go golfing! B was in total heaven. We played more Candy Land this evening before bed.

And a big day today in another sense... he wore jeans and a new t-shirt for exactly one minute AND let me take a picture! They came off after that one minute, but one minute is one minute longer than I have seen him wear denim since he was a baby, so I'm thrilled with that! :)

(I should note, we did get to celebrate with BOTH sets of his grandparents last weekend... we went out to dinner to Pizza Hut with them, where he received the spy plane from the new Cars 2 movie from my mom and dad, and a Cars 2 stunt set, a Cars 2 book, and a couple water guns from Josh's mom and dad. He loves them all! And can you tell he's a Cars fanatic??)

My baby said I didn't cry about him turning five, but that doesn't mean I didn't want to. He's come a long way in those five years and I couldn't be more in love.

the shoes

Brecken got some new shoes this weekend. We looked at three stores in Scottsbluff for just the right ones. He really wanted yellow and black ones, like his old shoes were. We looked and looked, and we found the perfect ones! He loved them from the start and I was really excited when he tried them on and he loved how they felt on him. I made him walk all over the store, try running, etc., just to make sure they were going to work for his senses. *phew* - he wanted them!

The shoe on the left is the one he had on in the picture I took on his 4th birthday. The shoe on the right is the new one. The one on the left is a size 9. The shoe on the left is a size 12. 3 shoe sizes in one year. Holy moly. I about fell over! (He has been wearing Crocs all summer, of course, so we didn't have a "real" shoe size for him!)

(These shoes are lined up at the back.... you can't tell, but they are.)